Can someone explain to me why people calling into sports talk radio feel the need to preface their inane opinions by declaring they are a first-time caller and a long-time listener? Of what value is this information? Who gives a dinky shit if Sal from Yonkers is a "first-time, long-time?"
Way to go, Sal! You popped your sports talk cherry! Now go stick it back up your ass.
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I'll take those guys over the "regulars" (or so they think) who believe they can waste valuable air time by having a little bit of small talk before their actual question/comment.
"Hey thanks for taking my call. How are you?"
"Good. Whaddaya got?"
"Good. Congratulations on the new baby, by the way?"
"Thank you. Thank you. What's on your mind?"
"And sorry to hear about you Dad. I'll be praying for him."
"Thanks."
"Remember when you were at that book signing in Fort Lee last year? I was that guy who..."
ASK YOUR FUCKING QUESTION ALREADY!
Nobody cares that Mad Dog let you kiss his ass 6 months ago after he so graciously accepted your $19.95. He doesn't remember you! And he's not your buddy. And even if he was, NOBODY FUCKING CARES!
If you're so fucking chummy with these guys, just call them at home so the rest of us can actually listed to SPORTS talk.
Oh, you don't have their home phone number? Hmmmm, maybe that should be your first clue asshole.
As if being buddies with Fathead and Marbles is some kind of achievment. I'd rather hang out with Phil Mushnick.
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